Flirting in Qatar

May 11, 2009 at 12:56 pm (Everyday life situations) (, , , , )

I do understand that men by nature are hunters and like to chase after women. But I still do not understand the way Qatari men, or men in the Arabian Gulf in general, chase women and I never really understood the way of flirting in Qatar. I know I am Qatari, and I know that my society is very conservative, but still, the flirting method seems so unnatural and odd! Because to me, it seems more like harassment and insult than flirting. Isn’t flirting supposed to make you feel flattered and sexy? With Qatari men, it is completely the contrary; the more they harass you, the more successful they think they are. It is not unusual for a group of men to flirt or rather “harass” you all together at the same time. it is like a challenge between themselves. The more numbers you throw the cooler you are.

Staring, is flirting 101, or rather scanning or x-raying. You would feel naked from the way they stare at you; they stare with a sexy dreamy look, eyes and mouth half open. You can feel their sexual frustration strangling you; their looks are utterly violating that they make one feels that they want to put their dicks in ones mouth! Then comes flirting 102; which is following or rather, chasing. They would follow you to the end of earth. It doesn’t matter if you stopped to pray, they would wait outside the prayer room; it doesn’t matter that you want to shop for lingerie, they would pick it up for you. They will stick like glue, even if you don’t smile or give any sign of approval. That doesn’t matter to them, because you are an object they are having fun with. Flirting 103 is, saying pick up and flirting lines, with a sexy dreamy voice of course. (a Horney voice). They would say lame things like “what a gazelle” .. “oh god help me .. what beauty” .. “oh beautiful, I would die for you .. what a sexy walk”. “please have mercy on me and take the number” ( as if he will wait for my approval!) .. and Yes! They do think that this is what girls want to hear!

Of course during all of this, they would be shouting their number out loud several hundred times so that you memorize it. people would be giving the girl dirty looks. Why? …. Because she is the bitch who seduced them, if she didn’t want to be harassed she should have stayed at home or went out with a male member of her family! And if the girl tried to stop them, people would judge her as being “improper” to be shouting out loud in public. Moreover, some of those men would take advantage of this and insult the girl even more, and some, believe it or not, think it’s a way of being positively responsive to their harassment.

And after all of this harassment.. what is the result they expect? Do they seriously think that I would call someone who disrespected me that way?

I am writing about this because few days ago I broke my silence, I let out the anger of being harassed all those years. The story begins on a normal day in City Center shopping mall. I left the gym and had to do some errands. As I left, three boys saw me and changed their direction and started the chase. I first went to a prayer room to pray the afternoon prayer. I was surprised to see them waiting for me at the door, one of the boys said “I waited for you”. What am I supposed to say “thank you, you are so kind to wait?” I ignored him as I usually do when these things happened, and continued my shopping. I thought that they would give up after few minutes; if they see me unresponsive. But I was surprised when I saw them behind me in Carrefour. They followed me from isle to isle. I got irritated because I couldn’t finish my shopping. I couldn’t buy certain feminine products because I knew they would make silly comments about them. I only managed to buy glass candles and cleaning products. It was obvious that I had an angryserious face, but they didn’t care. An hour has passed and they were still behind me. I could hear their comments “am dead of this beauty man” .. “have mercy on me” . My anger started to build up as I saw people giving me judgmental looks. I didn’t want to shout at them, I never did such thing, I don’t know how to. I didn’t want to embarrass myself. My last stop before going home was Starbucks. I know the people who work there, so I started chatting with them a little before ordering my coffee. All the sudden, one of the three boys came so close to me and started saying “I have never seen such beauty in my life ….” At that moment I exploded, it was like something was taking control over me, I didn’t feel myself. I grabbed the heavy Carrefour bag that was full of glass candles up high as if I was going to hit him with it and screamed at the boy “if you don’t leave me alone and get the hell out of hear I swear to God I will crush your head with the glass in this bag you asshole” he got scared and ran away with his friends, as they were leaving I shouted “you animals .. get out of here you donkeys”. My hands was shaking, I looked around and realized the place was full of foreigners. I thought “shit, now they will think that Qataris are barbaric”. My friends at Starbucks were shocked. I said “they have been following me for two fucking hours, I didn’t smile or gave them any sign that am interested, why couldn’t they just leave me alone”. They said “why didn’t you call the police”. I know that if I did, they will be put immediately in prison for few days for harassing women. But I was not in the mood for all of that. I tried to calm myself and look in control. As I was waiting for the coffee, another man came next to me and said his number! But he left immediately after that. He didn’t give me the number because he was interested in me, it was just because I was a female. I am sure he will through the number at every female wearing black Abaya, at the end of the day, he will wait to count his victory.

I felt so proud of myself. Those boys deserve even worse. Who gives them the right to bother us this way, and who gives the society the right to judge us. To hell with them. I called my friends and told them about the incident. They laughed and shared my feelings. I decided I wont be intimidated or quiet anymore.

Few days later, two men followed me in City Center. They got in the elevator with me. I would usually get out or change my direction. But this time I decided not to. Because they do not deserve any importance. When all three of us got in, they starting saying “hey beautiful, whey are you mad, smile”. I gave them a look that showed how disgusted I were from them; how much I degrade them. Then I said “you men are disgrace, you are not men at all, what you do to me, will be done to your sister”. One guy was shocked, the other said “yeah yeah ok ok whatever”. I felt so happy for saying that, I spoke about their manhood, told them they were not men. That’s the biggest insult any man could get.

I do not mind flirting. Actually, am a big flirt myself. But not in such disrespectful way. If a guy approached me normally, respectfully, with a kind smile, chatting about something, telling me honestly that he is interested in me. Then I might be more responsive. Qatari men should learn a more civilized way of flirting. There is no need for the staring, chasing and harassment. We do not have to be so stressed out and sexually frustrated because of our conservative society. Just be normal. But I have to be honest and say, I would be more hesitant to allow a Qatari to approach me than any other nationality. That is because of all the gossip and rumors that I might have to face. Moreover, I know that most Qatari men are conservative themselves and are not very fond of marrying someone they flirted with in public because according to them “if she did it with me, then she can do it with any man, even after we are married”. But this is another topic that I will discuss later.

To conclude this story, I want to say something that a friend has mentioned when we were discussing flirting behavior within the Qatari society, he said “it is easier to sleep with a Qatari lady than to dine with her” …Think about that reality!

38 Comments

  1. Anonymous said,

    Re: Flirting

    I am so proud to know such a brave girl like you..
    Every female should react in the same way you did Maryam but from the first minute..you were so patient that you waited so long .. Your reaction towards the three guys will leave a black spot in theire faces and minds.. and if they ever think to bother some one else again they will defifinitely think of your raction first and will sure step back..

    If all of us react in the same way , we will sure
    overcome on this phenomenon in our society..

  2. Anonymous said,

    I’m really impressed !

    Some people when they write you feel like they are torturing you with their way of writing, other people they try to make you enjoy every word and not only that but they make sure that you will wait for their next article !
    Dear Mariam .. After what I just read? Trust me you are absolutely from the second group!
    I loved your topic, the way you described the problem and actually I felt your anger!
    Please don’t stop writing and continue to enjoy us with your talent!🙂

    Reem …

  3. Anonymous said,

    It’s sad that such things are happening in Qatar, it is said to see how shallow qatari guys became. However, I think that there are some ‘words’ in this aritcle that should note have been said, you are better than this.

    • mimizwords said,

      hello Anonymous,

      The point of having this Blog is to be able to express myself and say what i want. if it was not appropriate it does not mean that i didn’t think about it, it would still be in my head, and it would still be me.
      I am not better than this, because this is me, because i have the guts to say what i want and not pretend to be righteous or perfect like everyone else pretends to be in our society.

      • Anonymous said,

        Sometimes having the guts to say what you want is not the answer. If you face a problem, you try to solve it without descending down to levels below yours, even if you came back up. If you can’t solve it without doing so, then you go around it, or at least this is what i believe. Keeping your level is much more important than solving a problem.

        What we think about doesn’t always reflect who really we are, especially if we thought about it in rage, like the case you described, this is why i said, you are better than this.

      • mimizwords said,

        LOL i dont think anyone can solve this problem anytime soon, but i hope so

        am not trying to solve the problem anyway, but saying what i want sure makes me feel good, maybe you should try it sometimes🙂

        and dont worry, using certain words wont degrade my level or anything🙂

      • Anonymous said,

        I guess we will need to wait for the next generation and hope that things get better, but from the looks of it, the next generation doesn’t seem promising too — it seems that with the next generation the problem of guys giving girls hard time will be over to start a completely different story where guys flirt with guys…

  4. Anonymous said,

    is that so

    i agree with what you said .. and i totally disagree , i agree that why have some very bad mentalities here in qatar, talking about men of course , that really unfortunate, no proper education , zero understanding of Islam , no family gaudiness, but wait .. i said i totally disagree … why …
    why because there is always 2 sides for a story , girl would be giving looks , wearing very inappropriate cloths, walking around for no reason rather than satisfying their sick needs of making low minded idiots compliment their “beauty ” all day , why they keep smiling … why .. why they look happy when a boy keep shouting his number for 100 times … and guess what !!!! she calls … yes .. she calls … is she that stupid .. she knows that he a womanizer , but she end up talking and hanging out with him, even more , having a sexual relationship with him .
    one more thing i lived in USA for 5 years , and in UK for 4 years , i’ve been into many places , men are men , their brains are down in their genitals , thats why Islam came and controlled this desire , for both men and woman , undescent look is forbidden , undecent colths are forbidden ……

    • mimizwords said,

      Re: is that so

      oh yes,,, those girls are a different story,, maybe i will write about them one day ,, and another reason that i didn’t mention of why boys keep doing these things is because they do find some girls who actually like and seek this

  5. Anonymous said,

    sorry .. too long😀

    Well I will talk from a Qatari girl point of view ..
    first of all I like it when guys compliment me .. and I am sure all girls like it to .. whether they were perfect, self-righteous or even liberal .. BUT no one likes to be harassed.. Because following someone for 2 hrs is stalking which is a way of harassing people.. I swear maryam I sat with married ladies that were happy n excited that someone followed them or complimented them.. so we enjoy flirtation
    The thing is as you said the only way I would except flirtation is if a guy approached me in a decent way and told me that he likes me.. However IF this thing happened in DHOA no matter how good looking or how decent the guy is we will turn him down.. WHY because he is QATARI.. am I right .. Although if the same situation presented itself outside DOHA the respond won’t be the same.. What does that tell you … is that we are just contradicting ourselves..
    second When someone said that the girls will call .. it is right some girls won’t smile won’t react won’t even acknowledge the existence of the guy but yet again they will call .. it’s because some people are looking for love or to beloved and it could be the same case with the guy he might be looking for loce but using the wrong way .. the problem is that no one can do it the proper way .. not a lot have the right intentions when they do so .. I know that I drifted away and that’s not what we are talking about.. But the problem has deep roots and by mentioning those points we didn’t even scratch the surface..
    another thing is .. What are we expecting from people that are oppressed ?! some families in here don’t allow the men in the family to see or even have any kind of contact with their female cousins, and if they saw them in the street they wouldn’t know them, and they might even flirt with them
    What are we expecting from an upcoming generation that is lacking goals or self motivation and has lots of free time in their hands and I am not saying that all of them are like that or that only young guys do this.. even older guys and they are even worse..
    one more thing When you said to the guys in the elevator that the same thing is going to happen to their families, I am sure you felt good, but in my opinion it didn’t have any affect in them, because guys here are very protective over their own, and of course their response will be my family members will not go out looking like this, or dressed up like that, IF ONLY THEY KNEW
    As you can see I am neither attacking nor defending guys, I just want everybody to know some of the reasons why this is going on .. some girls like it and seek it .. some guys find it as a way of killing time, some want love and have no other way to look for it .. some are just plain stupid and should get kicked .. but confronting them like you did is a good step.. coz it has been going on for a long time and it need to be stopped.. now how are we going to do that, only god knows

    A7s ene katba mo’9o3 ensha2 lol .. love the way u write .. it is clear, precise and straight to the point oh ya and let’s not forget hilarious loool

    • Anonymous said,

      Re: sorry .. too long😀

      A Qatari guy perspective here:

      To keep it short I think whoever wrote this comment above me is pickingwords from my mouth(so to speak). She said exactly what I want to say. She is objective, and honest. Well done whoever you are.

      I also want to first thank Maryam for raising the issue, secondly commend her on her courage, and finally, ask her to go easy on us Qatari guys. Tara we are suffering as well in this society of ours(not to the same extent as you girls, but still suffering enough to cause a lot of unattractive repurcussions).

      I never really understood this flirting mentality in this society. Possibly becauseI was in an ENglish school I didnt have to revert to such ‘techniques’. I had female classmates and friends, and frankly if I was interested I would make her know about it. Ofcourse as this voice of reason commentor above me said. You can’t do that here in this society so… what can you do?

      il mohim, I won’t dwell. Really interesting blog. Keep up the good work😉

    • mimizwords said,

      Re: sorry .. too long😀

      hey Diva

      REPLY LOL

      i like your point of view, your always objective

  6. Anonymous said,

    Hope…

    Sorry, I am number 13!
    What you describe can also happen in France if the guys have nothing else to do. The main problem is that many qatari men are spoiled, unemployed or work only 2 hours a day.
    The second reason is the impossibility for Qatari girls and guys to do sports or other activities together. Things become different when male and female students are mixed at the University.
    People often associate France with love, sex and freedom. But I would say “it is easier to dine with a French lady than to sleep with her”.
    You have to be confident. I am sure that flirting methods will change in Qatar… thanks to determined women like you !!!

    • Anonymous said,

      Re: Hope…

      at the commentor above me,

      “The main problem is that many qatari men are spoiled, unemployed or work only 2 hours a day.”

      And I can say that most Qatari girls care more about their looks then what is inside. They memorised the chanel and Louis Vuitton new season products plus prices from the catalogues before deciding what they want to study in uni or what they want to do with their lives. They lack ambition and are looking to bag a guy for marriage. but yes, its all the qatari men’s fault for being spoiled right?

      Try to look at it in an objective manner please. I hope u understand that the paragraph above is just me trying to illustrate that generalising like this makes no sense at all and is quite detrimental to the problem as oppose to identifying it then hopefully trying to fix it.

  7. Anonymous said,

    The Consequences of Love

    I found the book ‘The Consequences of Love’ by Sulaiman Addonia insightful on this subject. You may want to read it.

    The author is in Saudi Arabia, in a segregated society, where he builds a lot of hopes and dreams without much basis, on a woman who’s face he has not even seen.

    I’d probably ruin the book if I tried to summarise or interpret the themes that are presented.

    But, from a personal perspective a lot of past experiences with obsessive men suddenly started to make sense as I read this book. I always found it puzzling how someone can be so fixated on a girl he barely knew, now looking back and comparing to the author of this book, in comparison the men I met knew a lot more than he did, and it fuels the obsessive so called “love” they have.

    One final point: you picked your bag and threatened to smash the glass on his head??? haha although it is disgusting that they made you uncomfortable, but 3afya 3alech!

  8. Nasser Al-Naama said,

    Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!! And a thousand thank you’s more! you have really hit the nail on the head, and for that you deserve nothing but praise! I applaud your courage, and would like to say, although I just happened to have stumbled upon your lovely blog, I am already head over heels in love with it! keep up the good work, and If you don’t mind I’ve referenced your blog entry along with the link as a facebook note on my profile! I believe everyone who has been through what you did deserves to know that they are not alone, and that there is someone out there who refuses to stay silent anymore and chose to speak up instead! keep up the great work! =))

    • mimizwords said,

      Dear Nasser

      Its nice to make your acquaintance through this blog and refer me to yours if you have one. I would be more than happy if you shared this blog on your FB

      Thank you for your kind words and appreciation it means a lot to me that i can connect with people through my ideas, wether they agree or disagree, its always good to exchange ideas and open a dialogue.

      Feel free to post your comments

      Best,

  9. mona farah said,

    mimiz, i totally understand your plight, having lived in the middle east and studied in Dubai..i really understand where your frustration comes from, and that’s exactly why i dated non khaleeji men, no matter how good looking or interesting or as smart as some might be..but they totally approach you the wrong way and if they do get to you..they only have 1 and 1 only intent..its to have sex!!

    am not Arabic myself but i look really khaleeji and i wear the sheila and abaya too, so i had all sorts of gestures, numbers thrown at me..being followed by cars..one even had the audacity to follow me to my flat in the dorms..which could have turned out really nasty hadn’t my supervisor intervened..

    people in this region need further education when it comes learning how initiate a conversation..i guess i couldn’t add more to what you said earlier though

    bes be 9ra7ah wala ystahloon🙂

    • mimizwords said,

      Dear Mona

      Am glad that you liked my blog, hope to have you as a usual reader.

      I have to admit that i was not completely fair, i should have mentioned that not all men are like that. Also, some of my friends have mentioned the reasons for men to chase women this way is that they simply dont know any other way!

      but, i guess each girl has a similar story, and thats why i wanted to share mine. maybe boys would have a better incite on to how to approach girls

  10. Nasser Al-Naama said,

    Hi…typed up a really kewl comment, clicked submit but didn’t go thru!😦
    gist of it was, I love your blog, love this post, and I totally wholeheartedly 100% agree with what you had to say! can you believe some guys actually had the gull to follow my sister when I was walking right next to her?! primitive, over-excited assholes that’s what they are! of course bearing in mind they’re not all like that, but sadly they are the rule rather than the exception!

    Cool blog…keep up the good work!

  11. Nasser Al-Naama said,

    2beh Maryam so sorry tawnee 2la7e6′ inah it went thru! gawd Im so clumsy! lol

    i had a blog for a short while, and then I neglected it. Maybe I’ll go back to it someday, who knows..

    Anyhow, 3indij fb? 3adee 26’a 6’iftij?

    And Mona LOL you weren’t kidding when you said you’re addicted to Maryam’s blog, bas what’s up with the new moniker? if you’re trying to be anonymous, you’ve failed miserably!😛 3eraftij 3ala 6ool lool

    • mimizwords said,

      Dear Nasser

      no worries, you can post as much comments as you want🙂

      I hope you start writing again in your blog coz writing is such a relief and we can exchange ideas and start a dialogue about different issues in our soceity.

  12. Nasser Al-Naama said,

    Interesting. This is what one of my fb friends had to say about your blog post.

    “Although the topic discussed is a true issue in Qatar, but this lady did not do much for me she doesn’t sound genuine to me. more like ” In this essay, I intend to collect all the hot quotes I got praising my beauty” lol
    Wo she admits being a big flirt & (( If a guy approached me normally, respectfully, with a kind smile, chatting about something, telling me honestly that he is interested in me. Then I might be more responsive. Qatari men should learn a more civilized way of flirting ))
    ^ So if a Qatari guy happens to be very skilled in flirting, and seducing women gracefully he is justified in flirting with women in Qatar? I am sure there are hoards of them here.so she should keep her fingers crossed next time she visits city center it’s rather funny that she is complaining about the technique of flirting ..not the flirting itself, when flirting in its’ essence- between unmarried individuals- is forbidden in Islam and this region.”

    What say you?

    • mimizwords said,

      I understand your friend’s point of view. It seems that he/she understood some things differently than what I intended to show, maybe it’s my fault because I didn’t explain certain things. But it’s ok. Am not going to try to explain myself because I have to clear up many issues to make your friend understand what I meant exactly and where I come from by saying what I said about flirtation. Let’s just say we both have different understanding or concept of what flirtation is. Maybe it’s my fault that I didn’t explain what I meant exactly but it would have been such a long blog and all I wanted is to tell a story.

      LOL I didn’t mean to praise my beauty hehehehe. Boys would even call a monkey beautiful as long as it’s wearing a black abaya. What I meant that boys always through this line thinking that girls would fall for them if they mentioned how beautiful they are.

      And lastly, am not saying flirting is right or wrong. My comment was that, as long as they will do it, they might as well do it right! I didn’t mean to implement that flirtation is my goal every time I go out; its not like am looking for my soul mate there, never! LOL
      I know that no matter how their ways were seductive, they are never serious. But comon, lets be honest, who doesn’t enjoy a complement! 

      But seriously, it was just a story. Not an advice on how to improve your flirting or anything, it was just a laugh🙂

      And lastly, I never wish to discuss religion or politics in my blog.

  13. Mohammed Alhamadi said,

    Interesting writing skills, yet the story added nothing new.. This is an old story that has been there forever, weather it was by saying the number, using bluetooth, or throwing tapes like the 80s or early 90s, or even following the girls in markets and saying poetry back in the Jahilya days…

    This is human nature and it will remain like that forever as long as it does work for some cases and the guy get rewarded with a phone call every once in a while.

    The methods used are barbaric, no doubt about that, but again, as a human, adapting to the situation within the current life conditions in Doha would creates such act. U got a SO CALLED conservative society which I call (two faced), and u got the common understanding that to be cool u gotta do such acts and u have to treat women as objects that are made for men to play with!!! plus other things that would lead to such behaviors. This is all resulted by the society we live in., and the blame is not only on the guys..

    • mimizwords said,

      Dead Mohammad

      first of all .. throwing tapes! hahahahahha i didnt know about that .. what was the content of those tapes?

      i like your comment and agree with what you said .. thank you for taking time to comment

    • Qatari "nice" boy said,

      I strongly agree with the “blame is not only on the guys.”.

  14. Homme du Qatar said,

    I would like to say, that this article is important for all Qatari girls, or girls in Qatar in general is quite important. I also, would like to applaud the author for getting off her “but”, as I would not tolerate such harassment “BUT” what would people, especially Qataris unfortunately, say if I react? Or those womanizers would leave me alone if I screamed at them “BUT” everyone would misjudge me for talking back and not being what the Qataris wants me to be? I want every women in Qatar, my sisters, my friends, my family, to be respected “BUT” will me, myself, alone, my reaction can alter this mentality of Qatari men objectifying Qatari women? Guess what, these “BUT”s are the reason why many men keep doing what they are doing, and as in Qatar there is not even genuine people who would go and ask those kind of Qatari men to stop harassing women in public, or women who would hit a man with a her purse? But I have lost hope in men, but my hope is much bigger in the female part of the Qatari population. I am a believer that if you want to see change, do not set on your “BUT” and wait for others to change it for you. The problem is we like our “BUT”s and we are satisfied with them, we set on them and everyone leave us alone, huh! Qatari women need to get off their “BUT”s, so how do they do that? “IF QATARI WOMEN WANT TO STOP BEING HARASSED AND VIOLATED, THEY NEED TO STAND UP FOR THEMSELVES.” So, what does that mean? Standing up for yourself is a simple idea, it is basically the act of supporting yourself in a position of strength. So I would like from you, Qatari woman, to think about your “BUT”s and this is about knowing yourself more, and understanding what does it mean to be a woman in Qatar. The first thing you need to do is to be comfortable to get off and stand up for yourself. I know you are very afraid, but I know you want to end this, change this insulting degrading and disrespectful behavior of Qatari men. Don’t you want to be free doing your shopping with your friends, walking outside in the Souq and enjoying the outdoors ( when it’s not too hot of course ), having a meal a nice meal with your buddies in any restaurant your heart desires, and simply being yourself. So why do you keep pacing around your self freedom and never attempt to get it? So, you need to be yourself, be comfortable, and when you are, you can do anything. So, what do you really want? What are you looking for? Can’t you feel free, can’t you be yourself? Do you know what does that feel like? Close your eyes for a second and imagine being yourself, the feeling of free will that was granted to you by your creator, and not Qatari men. And do it all for yourself. Start with having that feeling inside, and maybe you’ll be able to stand up for yourself. Stop those feelings of pity and shame. Be proud of your values, your beliefs and ethics which those men lack. Also, be natural when you become proud and not arrogant or selfish, and let it stem from your core, to stand up not only for crazy horny sexually frustrated guys who can’t even pleasure their wives, but for any type of oppression that you would face because you are Qatari, at work, at home, at school, or wherever. Or else what, you are going to feel sorry for yourself and stay in your bedroom and cry on the bed? Is that the person you want to be? That you will never be free, you’ll never be what you want? Cause you keep listening to people, especially the same ones who keep judging you! What is going on, why have you been feeding your “BUT”s for too long, and they have gotten so big that you can’t get up and stand for yourself. Try this, write down your insecurities and try to get rid of them. Interesting thing, those insecurities are as real as you believe in them. I am not here to tell you that you can do anything your life, but I believe that if you are clinching to those insecurities and feelings or pity you can’t go any where in life, and you will never be able to be what you want to be. The challenge is you need to stand, so where can you stand? In yourself, with your friends, with your family, no no no, it is in the now, in the present, you have to stand up now. Stop being in the past, or thinking of the future, the present moment is all you got, so if you want to change things, it is you, Qatari woman, in this moment.
    To be Continued…

    • mimizwords said,

      l’homme du Qatar

      Merci bqp pour votre reponse, je le trouve tres interesent, mais quand t’as utulise le “but” j’ai eu l’impresion que c’est qqch d’autre hahahahahahahahhah

      I am glad that you have hope in the female population, it also seems from your response and many others that i have received regarding this topic that there is even more hope for Qatari men.

      I agree with you when you said women have to stand up for themselves, but reality is that its not easy, we would have to sacrifice things and go through hard time while doing so. Of course, the issue now is not exclusively about flirting. Flirting is just one example of what we have to face in silence. but it doesnt have to be like that, just like what you said.

      it is funny how you mentioned things that men take for granted like” be free doing your shopping with your friends, walking outside in the Souq and enjoying the outdoors ( when it’s not too hot of course ), having a meal a nice meal with your buddies in any restaurant your heart desires, and simply being yourself” it might seem silly, but the truth is that we do not get to enjoy this whenever we want to.

      But standing up for ones beliefs and values have great cost in our society. especially if you are a woman. i dont want to sound so melodramatic but unfortunately this is the truth.

      looking forward for the rest of what you have to say, i hope you have a chance to look at my other writing.

  15. mona farah said,

    wow mimiz..shnoo ybti 3ala nafsch..what was initially supposed 2 be a mere rant and gettin it-out-of-my-system…turned into a debate can’t say heated yet though🙂

    but nice blog..i just wished it covered a lot more aspects not necessarily about religion or politics but maybe some pertaining issues like lack of tourism in the country😦

    salam for now

    • mimizwords said,

      Dear Mona, feel free to post anything you wish,

      dont worry many ideas are coming on the way

  16. Qatari "nice" boy said,

    As a very sociable Qatari man….. I know lots of Qatari young men…. they are like diamonds… unfortunately you only met the bad guys … those who goes to shopping malls doing nothing but chasing ladies… trust me the majority of Qatari men are not like that at all,,,,, you just showed everyone who read your blog a very bad image about us………. Bad people are everywhere and so are good people,,,, and normally good people are always the majority…. I can assure you all that Qatari guys are not that bad…. Not just because three stupid young guys were chasing, you are saying all the Qatari guys are evilsss…… Haram…… you also have to know that lots of the Qatari girls are going to the shopping malls just to attract boys and steel them from their wives,, and they dress that like they are going to wedding… any normal man
    (espically crazy ones) when he sees a girl like that will die to talk to her… however I do not say that all Qatari woman are evils…. My sisters are very nice,, my mum,,,, too many girls I met at my university are soooooooooooo nice …. Only very few of them are bad just like guys…… the same thing happened to me … I was in one of the Qatari shopping mall in Qatar with my mum… suddenly a very beautiful lady was coming toward us and obviously trying to attract me and get my attention.. my mum went so crazy and was going to shout at her but I stopped her…….. wallah my sister this is life … you meet good and bad people…. Do not hate a society just because of minority…… you could have stopped the guys and talked to them in a nice way that what they are doing is really bad and you are not the kind of woman who wants that,,,, they will even listen to you trust me…..
    You are acting like American after the 11 of September…… when few “Muslims “did what they did .. they just hated Islam and all Muslims…because they are ignorant… well, I am sure you are not….. You for some reason hated the Qatari men and Qatar because of a silly story you just made it sooooooo huge….
    Forgive me if I am being rood.. as I was really upset of the way you described the Qatari men in general and words you used….

    and honestly what made me more crazy and upset are those qatari boys who did not even comment on that saying they are against…. wake up guyssss.. pleaseee…

    sister…. i am really sorry agian …… good like with life

    • another Qatari "nice" boy said,

      You said it all, you have my thumb up.

  17. Yoyo AG said,

    Man I’m glad I found this blog =/ Did you know it’s on Google as a top ranked search or something in regards to this topic? I won’t mention the search since I’m actually kinda embarrassed to tell you ;p

    But really, what you said was within your right, and I literally read every single word you have to offer in this one post because I was so interested in perceiving what a liberal Qatari thinks about the matter.

    I myself am Palestinian who has resided within Qatar all my life. I know the country’s culture, it’s values, it’s traits and almost every single characteristics: from the point that Four Wheels = Nationalistic Pride to how to properly serve Gahwa to foreigners, it’s all in the books.

    That being said though, I have been in cars with my “friends” who did some..pretty..what’s the word? I guess you can go for primitive or childish, things when it comes to flirting. I mean shouting numbers? Throwing numbers? The use of blackberry’s only encouraged them to go further! I mean, really. Needless to say I have outgrown these “friends” of mine and have moved on to a more of a socially mature group.

    As you said, flirting is a natural cause of circumstance. We’re humans after all. However I strongly, STRONGLY believe there is a right way and a wrong way. For one, this whole “I would die for you” crap needs to be put in an end. I mean really, it’s so dramatic it’s almost a joke. Also, you need to be careful with what you say because clearly, because we live in a country under Sharia, it’s punishable by law. But furthermore, and more importantly, a woman’s respect is the most valued thing in this world, And this has to apply to every society, not just the Qatari one.

    I want to follow this blog more often and I’m not so sure that you post more, but just know that there is a guy in this nation that has a heavy interest in your perceptions, so please, keep it up =)

    I’d like to end this post by saying that I LOVE this country. All my best friends, every single one of them, are Qatari, ironically they are the ones that have been “internationally open” as in, being liberal in the right sense. I’m only saying this because in no way, shape, or form did I ever think “Man Qataris are pretty barbaric people.” It’s the person, not his passport and/or ethnicity!

    Thanks again, see ya!

    • mimizwords said,

      Dear Yoyo AG .. thank you for your comment I enjoyed reading it. I understand that this post might seem shocking or confusing for others but for someone like you .. you simply get it ! I feel that the ‘throwing number’ style is coming to an end soon. As the countries opens up people are becoming more ‘relaxed’ LOL.

      It is very nice of you to say that you love Qatar, and for me you are Qatari as much as everyone else since you lived here your whole life.

      I have stopped blogging but I hope you go through the blog and have a look at my old posts.

      salut

  18. annonymous said,

    I just have to say, I definitely agree what you wrote.
    I had the same problem with you last months when the qatari man tries to chasing me, and of course his friend too. He was always waited for me until my class finished. He didnt care about his class, probably followed wherever i go.
    At this time, I heard too much like “I love you” , ” you’re such a beautiful girl I ever seen”. ” I just have only you in the world” blah blah blah. And the ones made I felt like harres was this morning ,I woke up and received 17 messages from him, with one sentence.
    Some days later, I went out with him. You may knew happened to me, right?
    Darn~!!!

  19. Dr. B said,

    I caught some peeks

    I am a american and successful engineer living and working here in Qatar. I am happily married and when walking with my wife I get flirty looks from Qatari women! I know women are women regardless of their religion and what they wear or symbolize. Flirting is a two way street and it is a natural way of a man and a woman. The problem is when you believe that it is not and suppress natural feeling behind a facade, whatever it may be. I do not see a problem with flirting as the lady says if it is kept in context. I have observed many Qatari men staring at my wife then duck behind the idea they are disciplined men and are practicing their religion but are being enticed by the western culture or undisciplined westerners. Islam is a very disciplined and loving religion do not let a few people hide behind Islam as pretenders when others are practicing what they preach.

  20. Niji Padma Gosh said,

    Dear Mimiz,

    I am an expat and quite surprised to read your blog (after so many years it was posted). I have seen girls of other nationalities in such situations. To be frank I never thought Qatari girls could also face this problem. Anyway glad that you could handle it in a nicely. You had the advantage of being the national, think about other girls in same situation. Many consider girls/ladies as commodities, and this is there across the globe. The only way to resolve this is to start from home. Teach our kids to behave properly and to respect the other gender. Let us be unbiased and impartial.

    Good luck, keep writing.
    Niji

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